All By Myself

Sigh.

I miss JD, almost as if he wasn’t around at all.  Whether he’s prepping his uniform, studying, or passed out in recovery mode, his life is all academy, all the time.  I’m not mad at him (I mean, he can’t help how much is required of him), but I am a little mad as his instructors- not because I think the work is unreasonable or unexpected, but because I just want to be mad at someone.

Yesterday was the first day of redman, and thanks to his USMC training, his first battle was a success, minus a few rookie mistakes, which left him vulnerable to a few shots to the face.  There was no visible bruising, but when I looked closely, I could see his right eye was slightly puffy.

He was drained both physically and mentally, and he waddled around the house like a severely arthritic 80 year old.  “I’m not studying tonight,” he announced.  “I want to go to bed early.”  I was thrilled as visions of us lying in bed with a movie entered my mind.  I even let him pick the movie.

After dinner, prepping his uniform, and a shower, we got in bed.  As I set my alarm, I told him he could start the movie.  “You can watch what you want,” he replied.  “I’m just going to pass out anyway.”  I looked at the clock.  It was 9:11.  As promised, it was only a few minutes into the movie before he was sound asleep next to me, so I turned off the movie and watched HGTV instead… by myself… in the darkness.

So I guess the academy wins again.