The Day the Holly Bush Died

Before I begin the story, you have to understand the following:

1.  This summer, JD and I bought a brand spankin' new 2011 Dodge Charger.  This thing is his baby.  He loves it more than he loved the Mustang he had when we first met.  At times, he may love this thing more than me, but I'm a lot moodier than the Charger, so I can't blame him for that, really.

2.  We have a holly bush next to our driveway that we've always hated, mostly because it's overgrown and has been since we moved in.  So overgrown that we'd need an electric hedge trimmer to really take care of it, but we don't have an electric hedge trimmer and on the long list of house projects we want to finish, the holly bush is not at the top of the list.  Also, it serves no purpose other than blocking part of our driveway. 

I apologize for the picture.  This was the best "before" picture I could find.  The bush is on the far left.

3.  Our driveway is unnecessarily steep.  So steep that you have to back out at a certain angle otherwise you scrape the bottom of your car.  

Now, on to the story.  A few weeks ago, we're backing out of the driveway in the Charger with a couple of friends in the back seat.  I was fiddling with the radio, which means JD immediately had to undo what I just did (man thing, I guess).  As he's playing with the radio, he starts to turn at the end of the driveway.  He has to cut his car extra hard because there's a trailer hitch on the back, making it much more vulnerable to hitting the street as we're backing out.  As we're (jokingly) arguing over the radio controls, we hear a scraping noise.  Thinking it's the trailer hitch (which you can't really help but hit once in a while), he ignored it and continue backing out.... that is, until our friend in the backseat started yelling. 

"Mailbox.  MAILBOX.  MAILBOX!!!" she practically screamed.

Oh.  Shit.

If you refer back to my earlier picture, the mailbox sits right in front of that holly bush, and yes, in his distracted state, JD had cut the corner too soon and made a nice long scratch along the back panel of his car.  His brand new car.  His baby.  His pride and joy.

The ranting about the holly bush began immediately.

"I've always hated that holly bush!  I'm digging it out tomorrow!  If it wouldn't have been there, I would have seen the mailbox and never would have hit it!"

A few days later, JD kept his promise and cut down the holly bush.  Okay, technically it was JD's friend who did the work while JD sat and watched, but either way the holly bush is gone.  I can't say I miss it.  I think it makes the front yard a little more open and inviting, especially once the stump is removed.

For now, the scratch on the car remains, but we will get it fixed.  Soon, there will be no evidence it ever happened.  However, from now on I'm sure JD will look twice as he's backing down the driveway, just in case.